It sneaks up on you.
You wake up one morning the rules have changed.
You have changed them.
A small adjustment here.
A small excuse there.
Before you know it you need more and more documentation to approve going out.
Intimate meetings with close friends are sufficient. To do nothing but just talk …about nothing and everything.
You look back you realise it has happened. You are old!
You are your parents age when you remember them being parents.
All of a sudden it’s children’s interests that interest You.
It’s the future that interest you.
The news are interesting all of a sudden.
You are interested in government.
You don’t want to work for them. But you want them to do good. You have a vested interest. You have a legacy to leave.
But you also have to just live well today.
All of a sudden “rest” is a trending word. If you are somewhere in the northern suburbs of jozi they call it “me time”.
All of a sudden one day you look forward to that day when it’s just your day.Not to do anything at all. Just to stay in bed til noon. Without having to be accountable to anyone. You don’t NEED to answer calls.
When your partner or spouse is your best friend, even better.
You both play truant. No responsibility. For once it’s just YOUR world, YOUR rules.
Yes sex is important. But you have a more realistic expectation of it right now.
You know some days it will just be mechanical like driving to the shops to buy bread. But then you know if you breathe, you can blow each others brains out. Because you have learned that to get more you have to let go. Of expectations. Of problems. Of worries. Of judgements… of some friends.
For some reason your bullshit radar has sharpened and you can hear nonsense coming from far. You know all of a sudden the nonsense to confront and the inconsequential.
All of it is about living well today. And securing this living well tomorrow.
When did you become so smart? When did you become so free? When did you become so… boring?
When did you become such a grown up?