This category contains 70 posts

An avenue of interrupted dreams

Sometimes when reality gets complicated, nothing like a visit to this township to give you perspective. In 35°C heat, the breeze was blowing gently, it was quiet. Somewhere was a family with 5 children having a picknick on the side of the road. I found myself remembering yet again…this is where most of us will … Continue reading

How to succed at changing your behaviour- for the better….

Did you know that you will keep repeating patterns of behaviour until you can  explore either explicitly or implicitly the root of these patterns? This week I have been preoccupied in my work by clients, colleagues and stories in general of us repeating patterns of behaviour even though we seek different results. Why this happens … Continue reading

…on giving and receiving and freeing yourself from resentment

Charity, Aid, support, help, gift: it comes in many names…. The danger in giving someone the help they didn’t ask for lies in your expectations. For many people offer help with the expectations of appreciation,  perhaps even celebration and validation. When that does not happen many become disenchanted, disillusioned and disappointed. Because then the receiver … Continue reading

What are the three things that stop coaches from selling their services effectively?

I have trained hundreds of coaches through the years through the Africa Centre for Work-Based Learning and elsewhere through the years. One of the toughest challenges coaches face is selling their coaching services. And I have found that there are at least three reasons why. The first is the lack of understanding of the sales … Continue reading

Many of us don’t know our own strength

A thought I wake up with is : many of us don’t know our own strength. We are not even close to realising the power within us. Many times it’s because we don’t perceive the world as it is…but as we fantasise about it. Other times it’s this false idea of humility which actually becomes … Continue reading


Well it’s pretty simple- Not listening well . While it’s a simple skill we take for granted, like seeing and feeling (and taste and smell for some special people), listening is possibly the most important skill a leader can develop. Many people will at this time perhaps start arguing and say that’s too simple, that … Continue reading


Running away from the complex human experience diminishes you, and by you diminishing yourself, you are essentially then slowing down or dis-empowering the rest of the system! Continue reading


Relationships with family are always interesting and particularly challenging. Mostly because we have created a social hierarchy of “Family” and as such emerged the rules that possibly advantage family over other circles of relating. And this is what makes it difficult because seldom are these boundaries clear- what criteria determines how far one goes to … Continue reading


Part of my work in coaching sessions is to help the clients to focus less on their problems and more on the results they want. Most of the time I’m not even concerned about the solutions and steps they take given that once the client understands more clearly the results they want , the solutions … Continue reading

Is it time for the lion to tell it’s tale…?

Eish…everytime I allow myself to read my timeline early in the morning, i just get upset nje. In particular the last two days by how this case of Gareth Cliff and M-net is reported. Each time I see a misleading headline I feel like either shutting the whole internet so that these misleaders can have … Continue reading

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