Coaching Thoughts: …Of Discipline & Parenting yourself

Today I’m thinking about discipline.

I see discipline as akin to PARENTING YOURSELF. Once you have made a decision that you want to develop a certain behavior, or achieve a certain outcome- you have to parent yourself. Forget about accountability partners – they are an extra- but the thing you need is to be your first level accountability partner.

This means that you commit to the behaviour – regardless of whether you are being watched or not. If it’s waking up, you wake up- whether you are being supervised or not. If it’s arriving on time at work, you do it regardless of whether the boss is there or not. If it’s a diet- you eat the diet you commit to regardless of the circumstances. Studying, developing a skill, writing that book- the same rule applies.

While it has been in the past proposed that it takes 21 days to learn a new habit/behaviour – research shows it’s more around 65 days. So this is how long you at least have to continue before the behaviour can become automatic.

If you let it slip just once during that period, trust me your brain sabotages you and you have to start again. You need at least three days of consistent application of that behaviour for you to return to the state before you broke the pattern.

I have coached a few Iron Man Fnalists in the last 10 years. A number of my friends are comrades enthusiasts. And they all confirm one thing: in order to make it to the finish line- more than capability, discipline is paramount. Discipline of what you eat, how often you train, sleep, etc.

This of course is not just about athletics- this is about anything you want to manifest in your life. Magic is one thing- Discipline is another.

As someone said: Without Commitment you won’t start – without consistency, you won’t finish!

Are you disciplined? In what? What do you want to develop discipline for in the next 65 days?

Mongezi C Makhalima is a Top 50 Global coach and Top 40 Global Change Champion who enjoys using his 30 years of experience working with some of the top leaders in many sectors across the globe, to evoke excellence in others.